Roles in all socio-economic & racial tiers are constantly being modified to suit the mores of that cultures society. Trending sexuality is the norm of the day and anything goes has shattered the albeit contrived balance of old.
Women have long since complied to the will and desire of men. We have endured, sacrificed, and suffered for the sake of our perceptions of what men want. The beautification process is substantive evidence of just how intensely pervasive this desire to be desired can be for women particularly. Being the object of affection drives women to dump trillions into the cosmetic and shoe industry alone. Clothiers, feminine hygenic products, and jewelry are also industries that benefit from a lack of self adoration from those in need of daily reinvention.
The misguided sense of value often imposed by a largely HOMOSEXUAL male dominated fashion industry has skewed the ethical fabric of the female’s perception of herself. Men with their fickle preferences have long been given undue leverage over a woman’s self esteem.
For many women that impression begins formulating within the eyes of her father. In cases where a pervasively positive male figure is absent, girls tend to seek the attention of males in whatever way gives a level of gratification to the female. “Some attention is better than none at all” is often the mentality of young girls and women. Unfortunately this mentality can also steer women into a destructive pattern of selecting “wrong men”, “wrong behaviors” and just wrong everything for themselves.
There have been cases in my personal journey towards or away from love (depending on the temperment)- where men have proven to be less than worthy of such a stronghold. Or perhaps I gave them too much and they tested my bounds to the point I rejected what I thought I wanted from them.
There was the guy who wanted to play with my “wabbly bits” as if I was some kind of hackey sac. Perhaps a poor analogy but that’s how it felt when he came anywhere near me. There was the fella who admitted that he liked watching shemale on female “action” and given my 6’0 ft frame the thought crossed my mind that perhaps he wanted me to participate in that particular brand of crazy. There was the highly intellectual extremely verial young man who believed that he was a shapeshifting wild cat once he went to sleep. Oh and the numerous brothers who were just so damaged and emotionally detached that embarking on any kind of serious relationship with a well balanced dual degreed professional black woman, may have caused them actual mental duress.
There were a couple of brothers who were already married…ewww. The brother who was engaged but wanted to know me better and a few brothers who wanted to “lock” me down in anyway they THOUGHT OF (babies, psychological warfare, etc.). I had an encounter with a brother who claimed to be an artist but tried to strangle the life out of your girl during a “love session”. There was the pastor who was more interested in chasing the young (much much younger) members of the congregation then chasing my old (at the time) thirty year old a$$. There have been the regal lovers from foreign lands who wanted to kidnap me and put me into some type of prehistoric indentured servant capacity in their country once married.
The proposals have come. But invariably weighing freedom against lifetime of psychological sparring with half baked individuals- caused precaution in areas of the heart especially while living in THIS area (the great metropolitan metropolis of Washington D.C.)