There are some fabulous articles within the November issue of ESSENCE magazine (regardless of color) that are impactful and speak to the issue.
Someone once tweeted “Have you ever realized that everything wrong with women begins with men?”. At the time I chuckled and scrolled up to the next post. HIS HYS-storectomy, MEN-apause, MEN-INGITIS, MEN-strual cycle, & MAN-ic depression. *LOL*
It was comical at the time but stuck as I had one encounter after another. These informal engaging study sessions would often be the conversations and observations of the movement of the men in my life. The arguement is undeniably that men are confused as hell. They don’t know what they want from one minute to the next and project that state of confusion onto the world. There are extreme insecurities that plague our men and they have not understood (probably because they haven’t taken the time to understand)-WHY?
The contention is that many of the issues that we are witnessing particularly at this position on our collective timeline- is the undeniable ABSENCE OF MEN/FATHERS from the lives of their children. It is not a Black issue nor a white one but it is a collective problem.
Being actively attentive to the needs of your children and loved ones is what is meant by being “PRESENT”. The physical presence is also important but at the end of the day being actively involved in the rearing, guidance, protection and provision of one’s family is the critical element of human development that is lacking in U.S. homes. What we are now seeing is that this pattern of behavior is spilling into the streets in a very negative way.
The impacts of motherless families/children with be forthcoming, however everything that has been read since the end of August continually mentions the need for safe male affirmation as a child.
This topic was used when preparing my thesis which was nearly ten years ago and the issue is worse than it was then.
Studies show that children who come from fatherless homes are less likely to finish high school, less likely to even attempt college, more likely to be incarcerated, more likely to engage in promiscous behaviors because they are seeking male validation or to prove that they are “masculine”. The studies also infer that children from fatherless homes are more likely to be violent (they feel THEY must protect THEMSELVES), engage in sexual deviance, are more likely to be impoverished or experience homelessness. Children and youth from fatherless homes are more likely to be classified as LGBQT and more apt to have emotional disorders. Beyond the contained studies done on certain populations who are often willing to provide honest answers to capture quality assurance and integrity of the study-look around you.
Kids setting other kids on fire, prison systems are busting at the seams to hold all of the criminals (innocent and guilty), men setting their women on fire or pouring acid on them because they are unable to articulate OR MIMIC functional communication skills, the increase of emotional disorders that do not enable a child to sit long enough to retain information being provided by their teachers, the increase of global human trafficking, the increase in sexual deviance of all kinds, and the increase of all kinds of criminal behavior are all things that need to be considered when addressing this very real problem.
